


iLove

by daydreaming68



Category: iCarly
Genre: Friendship, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-03-02
Updated: 2009-03-13
Packaged: 2013-08-09 08:58:45
Rating: K
Chapters: 20
Words: 8,665
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4898777/1/
Author URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1851863/daydreaming68
Summary: Response to "Who's Looking For A Challenge" by TwinkieTUTUS. Seddie drabbles. There will be twenty drabbles for the twenty verbs.





	1. Anticipated

** Anticipated:**

Certain things, I **anticipated** daily: my mother constantly trying to douse me in anti-bacterial lotion, being called upon as an example in school, my mother standing over me after school while I did my homework (although I was eighteen-years-old and a senior in high school she still treated me like a child), and _Samantha Puckett's _smile.

Usually, I got a glimpse of it when I pulled into the parking lot at school. She would be waiting by her car with a stack of books that she insisted I carry because, "If I am actually going to do my school work, then someone needs to carry my books." I would carry her books to her locker for her and she would thank me with that smile of hers. I would blame it on the pact Carly and I made about helping Sam as long as she was trying at school but I would have done it anyway if it meant seeing her smile.

Something I'd never **anticipated** was to feel this way about the girl who I'd spent my preteen years arguing with and who beat me up. It was an intense feeling that developed sometime between our first kiss and the end of my first real relationship with someone who wasn't her. This feeling could not compare to when I was infatuated with her best friend, a crush that passed with time. The past few years in high schools seemed to be a dance back and forth, neither of us wanting to truly admit our feelings. We were afraid to find out what happened after those words left our mouths. Still, I looked forward to seeing her smile, sometimes accompanied by a laugh, every morning.


	2. Irritated

a/n: ok, I'll end up posting one or two a day. I have them all finished anyways. Please review and let me know what you thought!!!

**Irritated**

Inspired by these lines in the song: _Breathe by Michelle Branch_

_I've been driving for an hour_

_ Just talking to the rain  
_

_ You say I've been driving you crazy_

The road sped away beneath my tires, our destination still a half-hour away. I'd promised to go with him to the art museum, an extra credit project for class, only if he let me drive. He hated it. I knew it was an issue with control, always wanting to be the one behind the wheel or even the camera, and it wasn't really my driving like he insisted it was. We'd been on the road for a while now and I wasn't willing to admit that I really wished he had driven because trying to navigate was difficult in the rain. I yelled at the road when I got lost and yelled at Freddie for confusing me plenty of times. I was too stubborn to pull over and let him drive the rest of the way.

"You're driving me crazy, Sam! Just follow the signs," he sighed and pointed through the rain at a blurry sign in the distance while I peered at him out of the corner of my eye. I tried, truly tryied my best not to laugh at him, but I couldn't help myself from giggling. He got **irritated** easily and that made him such an easy target. It kept our relationship at a distance when we fought. For now that worked for us...mainly due to the fact that I could never admit he was the only one who could make me giggle like that. It was too far of a stretch from what our relationship had evolved into.

Freddie sighed in irritation but there was a hint of amusement in it. He was **irritated** that I laughed at him for no reason but in another minute he would laugh along with me and I would finally give in and let him drive the rest of the way.


	3. Sassed

**Sassed**

"Samantha Puckett, do you plan on graduating?" our English teacher asked. I turned to look at Sam, sitting two rows over from me. Yes, she was half-asleep at her desk but she had done the reading, keeping to her promise about doing schoolwork. I could vouch for her from the ten calls I'd received around midnight with her questions on the book. I too was half-asleep at my desk but because of Sam's reputation, Miss Simon, chose to call Sam out.

"Actually, I was hoping that I would get to stay back and take English with you again," she said. I unsuccessfully attempted to cover my laughter with a cough. This wasn't the first time that Sam **sassed** our English teacher and it wouldn't be the last but the teacher's face was too priceless to ignore, as it was every tim Sam back talked her. She turned her glare on me. Sam's sass was going to get me in trouble yet again.

"Is something funny, Freddie?" Miss Simon asked. I looked down at the book on my desk. No matter how much I wanted too, I would never have the guts to tell off the teacher like Sam did.

"No, ma'am." I shook my head and pretended to be lost in the book.

"So are you going to test us on the chapter or not?" Sam asked, taking the attention away from me. "I'd like to get it over with before I forget everything." I smiled this time, knowing better than to laugh. Sam returned my smile as Miss Simon began her weekly lecture on respect because apparently _none_ of us had respect.

Sam's sass got her in trouble often and in turn led to me getting in trouble but it was something I loved about her personality. She wouldn't be Sam without being sassy.


	4. Focused

**Focused**

Upon entering high school, Freddie and Carly made me promise that I would make an effort. I went along with it because both of them went out of their ways to help me. If they cared enough to help me get by in school, then I owed it to them to actually try...of course it took me a year to figure this logic out. I'd managed so far in high school with decent grades due to my friends' help but my focus wasn't quite there as much as I tried. It was definitely an improvement from my time in middle school where I just barely passed.

Carly did well in school but Freddie was especially **focused**. He was a dedicated student a.k.a a nerd. I would never ever tell him but it was true that he knew everything. Of course I teased him mercilessly for it, because it would be weird if I didn't, but I also admired his focus. The way he could listen to a lecture without missing a single word or spacing out just once wasn't something that I aspired to but that focus was the same that he gave me. Whether it was something important or just random things for iCarly, his intense dark eyes were **focused** on me as I spoke. It made me feel special, as if I were the only person he wanted to listen to. Part of me wanted to be the only one who got that look while the other part of me teased him about him being the teacher's pet.

His focus was something I loved about his personality but I would never tell him in so many words. It was buried deep underneath the remarks I made but I think he was starting to catch on.


	5. Jabbed

a/n: I'm posting tonight becuase I have class all day tomorrow and won't get a chance to tomorrow.

The Harper that is mentioned in this chapter is the guy from iCarly Saves TV...

This chapter is one of the two that has a fight in in and the second of five that is inspired by song lyrics.

**Jabbed**

Inspired by this line from the song: _Face Down by the Red Jumpsuit Apparatus_

_Hey, girl, you know you drive me crazy…_

"So what, just because I'm not in front of the camera, I don't get a say?" I yelled, getting very annoyed with her. We'd had this argument countless numbers of times over the years and yet she still insisted my opinion didn't matter. My heart did funny things when I saw her but yet she could still drive me crazy every other moment of the day.

"Well, not if we're going to run out of time and yours is the bit that we can cut," Sam countered, rising from her seat in order for her eyes to be level with my chin. Still, she had a menacing glare even though she was smaller than me.

"We're going to get a soda…" Carly said calmly, rising from her seat and slowly backing out of the room. Harper, iCarly's musical contributor and Carly's on again off again boyfriend, followed her soundlessly, used to Sam and my fights.

"I say we flip for the spot." I said, reaching for a quarter in my pocket.

"Fine." Sam said, crossing her arms across her chest and watching while I held the quarter and told her to call it. "Heads," she decided as I tossed the coin.

Rather than wait for the coin to land, her elbow collided with my stomach and I doubled over while she caught the coin.

"What the hell?" I asked, clutching my stomach where she **jabbed** me roughly with her elbow.

"You get this one and I get the next one," she informed me, pocketing the quarter. I fell back into my beanbag chair and sighed. Of course Sam would not let a quarter make her decisions, she had to be in charge of that. She would give me this one for the cost of one painful jab to the gut. I accepted it but her methods truly drove me crazy.


	6. Dreaded

A/N: this is the third of five songs that are inspired by song lyrics.

**Dreaded**

Inspired by this line from the song: _First Time by Lifehouse_

_I'm feeling alive all over again..._

Freddie Benson was tall so I had to tilt my head in order to look him in the eye; his eyes were a warm brown that were friendly with just a hint of amusement that seemed to dance behind his eyes at times; his attractive facial features were either turned up in a smile while we did iCarly or twisted in confusion as he worked on his homework; and his manner of dressing was casual and like his mom no longer picked out his clothing. He was quite the catch although for the past year and a half he had stayed single…about the same length of time that I'd been single.

Seeing him made me feel strange when my feelings first surfaced. It was something that I **dreaded** for a while. My heart rate quickened and my mind went off to places I wasn't quite ready to be at yet. His touch sent my pulse to the sky. His smile…his laugh…when he was in a happy mood it seemed to be contagious so I smiled and I laughed. At first, I wondered if I was sick until I found that I missed that feeling when he wasn't around. I'd gone from completely dreading his presence, to _needing_ his presence. When Freddie was there, I felt alive in a strange way. It was so very un-me so I masked it with comments and remarks as usual and **dreaded** the moment when he would leave and I would be lost again.

We'd evolved to a happy medium in between then and what would inevitably come but for now I enjoyed the alive feeling that happened whenever Freddie was around.


	7. Flirted

**Flirted**

The few relationships that I've had in my teenage years involved little work to maintain and little work to break off. The only one that ever needed effort was my relationship with Sam. In the beginning the effort was to tolerate her for Carly's sake until I could call her a friend. The kiss on my fire escape changed everything. From that moment on it was an effort to pick fights with each other and keep them going just because we enjoyed arguing. It was an effort to help her with school and even more of an effort to keep myself in check around her. I'd developed an annoying habit where I said what I was thinking without processing it first.

"Your hair looks nice up," I noted one day as we waited for Carly at _Groovy Smoothie_. It was a mistake and I should have never said anything. She looked first shocked, then angry.

"What are you trying to say, it looks bad?" she asked, seemingly hurt by the comment I desperately wanted to take back. She yanked at her hair tie, letting the blond curls fall around her shoulders. That wasn't the way that Sam and I **flirted**. We were mean and rude to each other and that was how flirting worked with us. Now she thought I was genuinely being mean because I couldn't control the thoughts escaping my lips.

From that moment on, I'd been careful to sensor what came out of my mouth. I'd messed with the balance of things when I **flirted** the way I would have in a normal situation. Sam and I were far from a normal situation but neither of us objected to the extra effort we managed in our messed-up relationship.


	8. Teased

**Teased**

We began as enemies, moved to coworkers and some time around our kiss it changed to friends. There was not a word for what we were now. We were not friends like Freddie and Carly or Gibby and I but yet we were not even close to being much more than friends like Carly and Harper. It was difficult to describe the place we were at in our relationship but we had never grown out of that phase where we **teased** each other.

"Why do you wear that shirt?" I asked him, pointing at the faded black shirt with the skull on the front that he had for so long. It was desperately in need of being thrown away but yet he still wore it.

"Why do you wear that shirt?" he countered. I looked down at the plain cranberry colored top I wore and then back at his shirt.

"Because it isn't stupid or fading to the point where it has holes." I answered, tugging at an area of his shirt that was beginning to rip. His eyes narrowed and his mouth set in a line – it was the look I received when I successfully **teased** him into irritation.

"My mother has her book club once, maybe twice a month," Freddie replied although that didn't seem to explain his shirt. He continued on, "she's gone for several hours and I am a free man during that time." He said this with a smile on his face and gestured to his head. "Thus the shirt with a skull and the uncombed hair." I looked from his shirt to his hair and laughed loudly.

"And what are you going to do with it when we're at University of Washington next year and you only see her on weekends?" I asked, folding my arms across my chest and waited to see if he could come up with a witty remark. He looked down at his shirt then lifted his hand to touch his messy hair. His look became defeated.

"I'll probably get rid of the shirt and comb my hair," he answered. I laughed even louder and walked around him to leave the iCarly studio and find Carly so we could leave for the movies. "But I could buy another one if I wanted!" he called after me. I laughed harder and wondered if I could tease him about something else.


	9. Shrugged

an: ok so this chapter talks about Sam's mom and from what I've heard about her on icarly, this is the impression that I've gotten of her...and her character gave me the idea for this.

**Shrugged**

There were a few things that almost everyone knew about Sam. Number one: you did not mess with her or anyone close to her unless you wanted to be sent to the hospital and number two: never ever try and reach for food on Sam's plate because it ends in pain. Number three was something only known by Carly and I because we'd known her for so long: she kept herself guarded from certain emotions in order not to appear weak.

Sam lived with her irresponsible mother, who still wanted to be a teenager rather than a woman in her forties. I'd heard Sam's stories about her mother and met her on few occasions but I'd always wondered how Sam turned out as relatively normal as she had with a mother like that. The day she brought home her first A, I was there. Her mother was sitting in front of the television, watching her afternoon soaps and she turned to look at Sam.

"Well finally," she said before turning her attention back to the television. Sam was defeated by the lack of reaction from her mother and I desperately wanted to comfort her without knowing how. Luckily Carly was used to situations like these and took over.

School was almost over for us, just three short months until we graduated and were going to be freshman at University of Washington. That was when Sam's mother broke the news that she had decided to move to Vegas and become a bartender. She'd given up their apartment and found a small one in Vegas. Rather than expecting Sam to move with her, she counted on Carly being Sam's best friend (sometimes to the point of mothering) and letting Sam live with her. Of course Carly would never let Sam move to Las Vegas or be without a place to live so she took her in. Sam never really needed her mother because she had the best substitute there was, Carly, and money from her grandparents for college. So she pretended that she didn't care and, "I practically lived here anyway." But there was something like hurt that seemed to haunt her normally bright eyes.

Just as we placed the last box of stuff on her bed in Carly's room, I caught her looking at everything and sighing heavily.

"You ok?" I asked, trying to be casual but still concerned. I knew how Sam masked her emotions but hoped that maybe she would open up for once. Sam looked up and smiled.

"Fine!" she assured me a little too zealously. "Now how 'bout you buy me a smoothie and tell me about this strange concept called working for a living." I laughed but I couldn't help but wonder what was really going on in her head.

"You're sure?" I asked. Sam smiled again masking whatever was underneath and **shrugged** very delicately.

"It was bound to happen anyway," she said. "I'll be fine." That was the most I'd ever gotten out of her but with that casual shrug she managed to push the feelings away. She **shrugged** her mother away and any hope that she'd ever have that her mother would once care.

"Come on," I insisted, being daring and putting my arms around her shoulders. "I believe there is a job open at the library and it's easier than anything else." I made her smile a genuine smile and truly hoped that she would be ok.


	10. Tiptoed

**Tip-Toed**

I sat in the iCarly studio, with a book on my lap and the stereo playing softly in the background. There was a history test the next day and it counted for ten percent of my final grade – a serious test that I needed to pass. Carly had been helping me study until leaving ten minutes ago to speak with Harper (again) about getting back together for the second time in a month. Freddie was on his way over to finish helping me study. I sighed heavily and began humming along with the music while trying to memorize the specific dates involved with the Vietnam War.

Looking up, I caught Freddie's reflection in the mirror. He just entered the iCarlu studio and spotted me sitting with my back to him. He wore a mischievous smile on his face, unaware that I could actually see him. He carefully let the door shut and paused for a moment to look at me. Playing along, I looked down at my book but watched him out of the corner of my eye. He looked as if he were trying not to laugh or make a sound. I too, was biting my lip to keep from loosing it.

Freddie moved away from the door and slowly **tip-toed** across the studio floor, avoiding all of the wires around his tech equipment. He stopped directly behind me and prepared to spook me. Just as his mouth opened, I cut him off.

"Nice try Fredward," I said, turning my head to smile at him. He looked shocked for a moment and then disappointed until a smile spread across his face.

"You always know," he said, shaking his head. He fell into the beanbag chair next to me.

"You **tip-toed** louder than the music!" I informed him. "Oh, and I could see your reflection in the mirror." He just smiled at me before reaching for the book on my lap and asking a question that I answered with a tiny hint from him. It was a possibility that we would be here all night studying...


	11. Humiliated

a/n: this is the fourth of five drabbles inspired by a song...

**Humiliated**

Inspired by these lines in the song: _My Life Would Suck Without You by Kelly Clarkson _

_And honestly,_

_My life would suck without you_

The results were in. No one seemed surprised when they made the announcement so no one reacted. My mother would be thrilled when I got home and shared the news with her but at school it was as if nothing happened and nothing was different. I got a cheerful hug and congratulations from Carly and a pat on the back from a teacher – that was the end of the story. I was the valedictorian and no one cared. I'd worked so hard in school, got rewarded for my achievements yet no one cared.

The day passed just like always and I was relieved to be at my locker at the end of the day. I could go home to someone who appreciated my success. Sam showed up at my side, clutching a book to her chest and resting her back against a neighboring locker. She wore a coy smile on her face as she looked at me.

"What?" I asked a little more rudely than I intended to. I was irritated with the lack of enthusiasm for my achievement.

"Nothing," she said although her smile insisted otherwise. I shrugged it off and pulled my locker open. I wasn't quite sure what had happened until it was over. In an instant a loud pop startled me but not as much as the shower of confetti that shot out at me.

I was trying to figure out how Sam got the confetti cannon into my locker at the same time that I looked up and found everyone staring at me. Sam was covered in confetti from head to toe and laughing at my reaction. This wasn't the first time Sam had **humiliated** me and it wouldn't be the last. She was a professional by now: we were in the middle of the hallway covered in confetti while our classmates laughed at the scene she had caused.

"Congratulations," she said, still smiling. I shut my locker and ran a hand through my hair, brushing away a pile of confetti. She'd **humiliated **me but she was the only one who cared enough to. She stood in front of me, fighting giggles and teasing me for being _too _smart but she was the one who cared enough to pull off this elaborate scheme. No one else would have done something this thoughtful and this inconsiderate except Sam. She had given me what I really wanted even if the price was humiliation.

"Damn!" she exclaimed as the others in the hallway began to scatter, still laughing at us. "The principal is coming." Sam grabbed my arm and pulled me away from the confetti mess. I realized then how much my life would suck without her.


	12. Hiccupped

**Hiccupped**

The day I turned eighteen, I wasn't allowed to skip school. Carly and Freddie promised that they had something special planned for later on as long as I spent the day being tortured at school. I managed, somehow, to get through the day appreciating the perks my birthday had to offer. I got a cake from Carly at lunch and Freddie carried ALL of my books to ALL of my classes for me. Gibby even took all of my notes for me (ok, it wasn't willingly - I kind of forced him to). It was shaping up to be a good day.

That was until I picked up the phone and made the call I shouldn't have made. When she didn't call me, I hoped that she wouldn't be home when _I_ called her. That would have been the reason that she hadn't called her daughter on her eighteenth birthday.

My mother was home when I called and apparently married.

She didn't remember or didn't care that it was my birthday but she went on and on about how she met the love of her life in a casino. I let her prattle on until she informed me that she should have moved to Vegas years ago. At that moment I ended the phone call and dropped my phone. I was eighteen now, with no ties to her remaining. I sunk further into the beanbag chair in the iCarly studio, wearing a denim skirt with my "It's my birthday!" t-shirt that was a gift from Carly.

I didn't want to feel sad over my mother because I should have expected it but I couldn't stop the trail of tears that poured down my cheeks or the always annoying hiccup that followed.

I only **hiccupped** when I cried and I rarely cried. My emotions were normally something that stayed inside of me but today I couldn't let it go. Carly was getting ready downstairs so I would be alone for a while – or I assumed that I would be alone for a while. Two minutes into the time I'd allowed myself to breakdown, Freddie walked into the studio. Hurriedly, I wiped at my eyes and tried to look away from him.

"Hey Freddork," I said and **hiccupped** yet again, giving away my secret.

"Are you ok?" he asked, hurrying to my side and looking concerned. I hated that he reacted like that but I was glad that he reacted like that. For the first time ever, I opened up to someone who was not Carly and what's worse I cried in front of him. He was glad that I hung up the phone and offered to give me my birthday present in advance. I couldn't resist an offer like that.

"Wow," I gasped, pulling out the silver chain from inside of the box. On the end of the chain was a silver butterfly pendant. I involuntarily **hiccupped** and smiled at Freddie. "I didn't think you had it in you – I wasn't expecting _this_," I said. Freddie looked sheepish.

"I guess I'll take that as a complement," Freddie said. "You know, there's a saying that if you have a secret wish capture a butterfly and whisper your wish to it. Butterflies can't speak so your secret is safe in their keeping." Leave it to Freddie to come up with something smart and know-it-all but I knew what my wish was. I looked at him while I wished for my wish to come true.


	13. Monopolized

**Monopolized **

Sam **monopolized** just about everything in my life. She **monopolized** the couch, barely leaving me room to sit; she **monopolized** the food in the refrigerator; she **monopolized **the remote control when we watched TV; she **monopolized **my time even if she didn't intend to; and she **monopolized **my thoughts without even trying.

I was finally admitting that I was in love with Samantha Puckett. Of course it wasn't her that I admitted this to or even out loud. In my head I knew that I had fallen hard for the girl who starred in my dreams night after night. I think Carly had caught on a while ago but instead of ruining it for Sam and I, she kept quiet. She sat back and let it all play out.

Sam wore the necklace I got her for her birthday everyday, claiming that it went with everything she had. Finding that birthday present, the perfect present had **monopolized **my time as well. Now that necklace around her neck, resting just below her collar bone, **monopolized** my thoughts in study hall when my homework was finished.


	14. Ripped

**Ripped**

As the school year was coming to an end, every senior was beginning to come down with Senioritis. Even our brilliant know-it-all valedictorian was beginning to catch the contagious disease.

The first symptom he came down with was staring off into space during a lecture; he had been daydreaming but he wouldn't tell me what he was thinking about.

His second symptom was putting his homework aside so that the three of us, Harper, and Gibby could go see a movie…on a school night!

The third symptom occurred in English class. We were supposed to write about our plans for next year so I began writing about how I intended on pursuing my education in college until a ball of paper landed on my desk. I looked up in alarm and saw Freddie smiling at me. I picked up the paper and unwrinkled it.

_This is the stupidest assignment ever. – Freddie_

I bit my bottom lip to keep from smiling at the drawing of Freddie sleeping at his desk and **ripped **a new piece of paper from my notebook. I responded and crumpled it into a ball before chucking it at Freddie. This continued on for the rest of class as we **ripped** pages from our notebooks and passed along plans for after school.

Freddie, who had never passed a note once in his high school career, was abandoning his assignment to pass notes. He had definitely come down with senioritis either that or getting valedictorian had **ripped** the sanity from him.


	15. Mystified

**Mystified **

I was on my way to class when I saw her in the library with a book and a set of note cards out in front of her. I stopped behind a bookshelf to watch her. Her lips moved with the words that she read until a smile worked its way across her face because she got it right. All the times that I'd seen her study, either I or Carly had been with her. I never actually thought that she studied on her own. Yet there she was with a book, studying. It was a weird thing to watch and I felt as if I blinked then the scene in front of me would disapear.

I could remember a time in eighth grade when she would never be seen near a book. That was when she needed to pass every single one of her finals with a B just to pass middle school with a C- average. Carly and I locked her in the iCarly studio and forced her to study so she could pass. That was when Carly and I made the pact to help Sam get through high school as long as Sam tried. Sam, after fighting us on it, promised us that she would make an effort. That was the moment that Sam changed and I was proud of her. Now I was **mystified **by how changed she really was.

She was a different person now, still sarcastic and brazen but yet she was thoughtful and clever. She used to be able to make me miserable now she just **mystified** me.

I smiled to myself and gave her focused face one last look before hurrying to class.


	16. Stuffed

a/n: I mention bacon in this drabble!!!!

**Stuffed**

When Carly was confused and needed time to think, she cooked. Lucky for me, she was in desperate need of time to think after Harper told her he loved her. I sat at the kitchen table while bacon sizzled on the stovetop and she stirred the batter for chocolate chip muffins.

"I mean, we've been together for three years," Carly said in distress for the fifth time that day.

"On and off," I added for the fifth time that day. I sat back in the chair and put a hand on my full stomach. I was **stuffed**. It took a lot to fill me up and on those days when Carly needed to think, I was always full. Once it was when she wasn't sure if she should take an AP class and another time it was when Spencer asked Carly if it was ok if his (serious for two years) girlfriend moved in.

"But I haven't dated anyone else since we started and neither has he." Carly whined. Just then the door opened and Freddie walked in. I was relieved to see him because someone had to help me finish off the rest of the food...or offer the advice that I couldn't.

"What's up?" Freddie asked. He stopped when he got into the kitchen and took in the scene of Carly furiously cooking and the mess she had created. "Uh, oh. What are we thinking about?" he fell into the seat next to me and grabbed a handful of French fries that Carly made a half hour ago.

"Harper loves her," I informed him. Even though I was **stuffed,** I too grabbed another fry.

"And you don't love him?" Freddie asked Carly. He looked at me questioningly as Carly took the bacon off of the stove and put it on plates for us.

"Of course I love him, Freddie!" Carly yelled. "How could you say something like that?"

"Then what's the problem?" Freddie whispered to me. I shrugged my shoulders and threw my hands up. I had no idea what the problem was or how to help Carly fix it but I'd been trying all day through eight courses.

"I don't know…" Carly said slowly. She paused in the middle of stirring the batter. The question wasn't meant for her but she answered it. Freddie and I looked at each other in confusion and then back at her. "I don't know!" she repeated with a smile on her face. She dropped the bowl of batter on the table and tore off her apron, sprinting from the room and out of the door. Freddie and I watched her run out and then turned back to look at each other.

"What was that?" Freddie asked.

"Couldn't tell you," I said. "But I am not cleaning up that mess!" I stuck my feet up on a chair and grabbed a piece of bacon. "At least they're finally admitting how they feel." I said. "That was annoying."

"Tell me about it," Freddie said, reaching for another piece of bacon.


	17. Glowed

**Glowed**

With Carly and Harper now blissfully in love, prom was starting to become a big deal. There wasn't one conversation with Carly that didn't involve limos, tuxes, dresses, parties...and a lot of other prom things that I tuned out. Sam refused to go to prom at first. It didn't surprise me because she wasn't a girly girl who would see prom as the highlight of her time in high school. She informed Carly that without a date, she refused to dress up and go out. That's when Carly convinced Sam and me to go to prom together – as friends. With a little reluctance, we agreed to go to prom for Carly.

Harper and I waited in the iCarly studio wearing ridiculous tuxedos while Mom snapped pictures of us waiting.

"Mom!" I exclaimed in exasperation but Spencer was into it too so she saw nothing wrong with what she was doing. He was snapping pictures, with his camera, waiting for Carly and Sam to finish getting ready. Amanda, Spencer's girlfriend, went downstairs ten minutes ago to see if they were ready yet. Mom put her camera down and reached for my tie.

"Freddie, you look so handsome," she said, smiling.

"Thanks," I said, trying not to blush or get embarrassed. Mom had taken me, with a swatch of the fabric for Sam's dress, to find a tuxedo. It was fairly simple black tux with the pale yellow tie and my hair was combed and gelled back. Mom was beyond happy that I was taking Sam to prom. Somehow, over the past few years, Mom and Sam had grown fond of each other. It started when Sam was at my house, waiting for me to get done with AV club and she began talking Mom. When I got home they were laughing about me and something funny or stupid that I did. That began a relationship that I wasn't sure I agreed with. They got along so I supposed that it was all I could ask for.

"Here they come," Spencer announced, pointing his camera toward the door. Carly came through the door first, wearing a red dress and a very big smile. Sam followed her, taking my breath away.

She was always beautiful but today she **glowed**. Her long blond curls were pulled up on top of her head with random crystals throughout. She had on just a faint trace of make-up but it highlighted her bright eyes perfectly. Her dress was strapless and fell to the floor – I knew that Sam would never wear heels so she had on flip-flops beneath the dress. She was the only girl who would wear plain old rubber flip-flops to prom and I loved that about her. Around her neck she wore the butterfly necklace that I had given her for her birthday. Her bare shoulders were covered in glitter making her sparkle and glow all over. I didn't know what to say as Mom shoved me over to her so she could get a good picture. She gushed about how beautiful Sam looked and snapped picture after picture.

"You look nice…" I said as delicately as possible so I wouldn't upset her. She jabbed me lightly with her elbow but the smile on her face made me think she was flattered.

"You're not so bad yourself," she said. I didn't say but I completely disagreed with her. No one could compare to how she **glowed** tonight.


	18. Consoled

**Consoled**

My last final exam was the day before graduation and it was the worst one: math. No matter how hard I tried in school, I would never get math. It was complicated and time consuming. X equals blah, blah, blah… How would I ever need that in life if I just wanted to have my own restaurant?

I stayed up all night going over all of the different formulas and problems and fell asleep on the couch with my book open. The next morning I was half-asleep as I got ready for school and muttered math problems under my breath. Freddie found me as I was gathering everything in my purse.

"Where's my calculator?" I asked worriedly. I began to chuck random items all over the living room, in search of my calculator.

"Sam," Freddie said.

"Freddie, I need that calculator! I can't do math _in my head_." I exclaimed, dumping the remaining contents of my purse.

"Sam!" Freddie said, yet again. My purse was empty so I turned to look at him, willing myself not to get upset. In his hand, he held my calculator.

"Where did you get that?" I asked. "I've been looking for it!"

"It was right behind you," Freddie said. I snatched my calculator from his hand and stuffed it in my bag. I moved to get the rest of my things but Freddie reached his hand out to stop me. "Calm down, Sam," he said, taking hold of both of my arms. "It's just a test and even if you fail, you'll still pass for the year and graduate." I stopped fidgeting and he relaxed his grip slightly. "You worked so hard, don't let this one test upset you."

"I'll still pass? Really?" I wondered. If that were the case then I could skip the test…then again I spent the night studying and I shouldn't let it go to waste.

"Yeah, of course." Freddie said. I breathed a sigh of relief.

"Why do you have to make sense and be the sensible one all the time?" I asked, hitting his chest and backing away.

Freddie began collecting my stuff and tossing it back in my purse as I sat down on the couch to catch my breath. Freddie had successfully **consoled** me but now who was going to help me sort out my feelings about him? I was a mess with wondering if there was a future for Freddie and me. Every time he **consoled** me, I wanted my birthday wish to come true more and more.


	19. Shivered

a/n: ok, this chapter is the one based on a movie - it is _loosely_ based on the scene in the notebook where Allie and Noah are kissing in the rain. The idea of them wanting each other so badly and just the moment of being swept up in each other's arms is what is based on the scene in the movie.

I felt that this drabble left somethings unexplained so I did a longer ONESHOT from this chapter. It is called ihateyou. Check it out if you want to know what happened prior to this!!!

Also if there are any other drabbles you want me to turn into oneshots, let me know!!!

This is the second fight drabble!

**Shivered**

_Inspired by the scene in the Notebook when Noah and Allie get caught in the rain…_

The rain poured down on the ceiling of the auditorium as we walked across the stage and received our diplomas. Sam, Carly, and I were now high school graduates. We took the pictures with Mom and Spencer before we left for the graduation party. It was at a hotel about a half hour from the school. Carly went with Harper and they took along Gibby, Michel'le (Gibby's girlfriend), and Jeremy while I took my car and Sam as my passenger. Sam's arms were folded across her chest and she stared out the window, watching the rain pour down. She was pissed but would not say why. I tried to ignore her but it was bothering me. I pressed the radio power and turned up the music. Sam slapped my hand away from the radio and turned it off.

"What is your problem?" I asked.

"You and your stupid music!" she answered.

"How has that been bothering you all day?" I said, beginning to get angry with her.

"You know what, just pull over!" she ordered.

"No!" I replied.

"Pull over!" she yelled louder.

"Fine!" I slammed on my breaks and pulled the car to the side of the road. I turned to look at her and listen to what she was going to say but instead she reached for the door. "What are you doing?" I asked. She stepped out of the car and slammed the door behind her; her shoes were still in the car so she was out running barefoot in the rain. I killed the engine and followed her into the rain. In an instant I was soaked as I followed her down the street. Her dress and jean jacket clung to her. "Sam!" I yelled. She stopped and turned around so I could catch up with her. As I reached her she hit me and let out a loud sob.

"What is this?" she asked angrily. "Today you give me that look that you always give me when you think I'm not looking! For some reason I thought that this time would be different. It was right there and you walked away from it! I can't believe I was stupid enough to think that things would change because we were graduating! Whatever it was is gone Freddie. It's over…" I stared at her in surprise. I had been right there. I wanted to but I couldn't make myself take that next step. I was scared and I missed my opportunity. She was taking something away from me that I never wanted to live without. I couldn't let her do it.

"Nothing is over," I assured her. I grabbed her shoulders and pulled her to me. She **shivered** beneath my touch from the cold rain and I held her tighter in effort to keep her warm. She looked up at me with her bright eyes, looking vulnerable and beautiful with tears and rain streaming down her cheeks. I smiled and pressed my lips against hers. She responded with enthusiasm and **shivered** again.

"Freddie…" she said breathlessly. There was so much that we needed to talk about but I'd waited for this moment for too long. I was not going to let words interfere with this.

"No," I said, interrupting her. She didn't object, still looking into my eyes with water dripping down her face. I smiled and pressed my lips to her forehead before brushing the wet hair from her face. Our mouths met again and neither of us interrupted with words.

We never made it to the party…


	20. Reassured

a/n: last drabble! :( let me know if there are any drabbles you want me to expand into oneshots!

**Reassured**

Inspired by these lines from the song: _Love Story by Taylor Swift_

_Romeo save me I've been feeling so alone_

_I keep waiting for you but you never come_

_Is this in my head? I don't know what to think…_

The morning after graduation, I awoke to the sun streaming in my window. Carly was waiting for my explanation on why I never made it to the party and was home _after _she was but I didn't quite know what to say because I didn't know myself. I waited so long for what happened last night and it was always Freddie who I'd imagined being with. Yesterday I'd doubted everything and today I was confused about where we went from here. We'd never had the most conventional relationship and I preferred that but Freddie and I needed to talk and sort a few things out…

I found him on his fire escape with a book in his lap, staring off into nothing. I smiled when I saw him, remembering yesterday.

"Hey," I said, knocking on the window. I fell into my all too familiar seat on the window sill as he turned to look at me. His face lit up when he saw me and I looked down, shyly. I was never shy – I hated that he could do that to me.

He moved to sit on the stairs so that we were facing each other. I braced myself and looked up at him as we stared at each other silently for a moment.

"What is this?" I asked in a low tone, not at all sure how to phrase the question. "Where do we go from here?" It was a start to whatever else had to be said. Where do we go after what happened – when we technically weren't in a relationship. I watched his face for a reaction. He still smiled. I wondered when the euphoria of yesterday would wear off…although I didn't ever want it to.

_And said, you'll never have to be alone_

_I love you and that's all I really know…_

"Well, I guess we're together – you know after what happened," he answered.

"I guess…" I replied slowly. It wasn't the answer that I was looking for but at least the definition was forming of what we were. We were "together" as vague as that was.

"Listen, Sam, all I know is that I love you and I want to be with you," he said. "I don't care about anyone else and I don't care if we fight every other day…" My heart stopped beating. I loved that he wanted to be with only me even if it was just us fighting but he said "love" and "you" in the same sentence referring to me.

"You love me?" I asked in a small voice. I had to grip onto the edge of the window sill to keep my balance.

"Yeah," he said. Those three words **reassured **me of my own feelings. Of course I loved him. When I was yelling at him and mocking him, I loved him. Last night I loved him and this morning I still loved him. It just took me this long and his reassurance to be able to admit it. He looked concerned by my lack of reaction. "Are you ok?" he asked. I smiled and nodded.

"Yes I am," I **reassured** him. Taking a deep breath, I leaned forward and pressed my lips against his willing ones. "I love you too." I assured him.

Freddie smiled and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me tight to his chest. I let my head rest against him and smiled. This was what I had feared for so long, afraid that it would change everything for the worse.

It felt like I should have _always_ been in his arms like this.

Still smiling (and unsure if I would ever not be smiling), I tilted my head to look at him, Freddie Benson, the guy I loved, my…boyfriend.

"You know this means that you'll have to see me all the time now?" I asked, pulling away slightly. "And even when you hate me you still have to love me?" I backed up even more and narrowed my eyes at him, waiting to see if I scared him off. He chuckled and pulled me back to him.

"Is that supposed to be a bad thing?" Freddie asked. "I _want_ to see you all of the time – even more than I already do and I couldn't stop loving you if I tried." I smiled and rested my forehead against his chest.

"Just checking…" I said. He picked up my chin and leaned down to kiss me again. The confusion and anxiety had vanished quickly, replaced by something else – a feeling I was beginning to like.

I wasn't sure how life could get better than this moment but with Freddie it had to…


End file.
